Something about myself I should probably explain beforehand however, in which I have come to realize has been a key point in my survival, is that I have a... I guess you could call it a "thing" for recording events about myself, as I am sure was apparent by this record itself.
Anyways, I am always taking notes, pictures, and sometimes video. They are not always every single occurrence or detail, but I record quite often and with enough information to recall and recover something in the past. I believe it helps me retain information and even knowledge about myself... well that has proven to be more or less true, but I digress.
The thing is, all of this, what ever you want to call this, didn't happen all at once, there were the signs I picked up on that lead to the beginning of everything, 366 days ago on December 1st, 2010. Loss of time. That was the big signal for me, and when I started to notice a change. Sure, I can be a bit space headed sometimes... but never would I completely forget or vaguely remember events as if I had been out drinking until I was utterly smashed. That's what it felt like.
It started off small, like forgetting what I was just doing, and progressed to larger gaps, of vaguely remembering where I was driving to, or why I had drove to the location in the first place. I started relying more and more on my notes to recall and refresh myself, not only to remember but reassure myself. That is when I started noticing other things around me, not sure if they were spawns of paranoia. Unfamiliar and out of place objects, people, and even locations started becoming noticeable to me, and it wasn't until my notes started to lose meaning did I really start to panic.
They were random tidbits of chicken scratch handwriting, but they made no sense in the flow on my usual recordings, and seemed to have no bearing on anything until what I like to call: Day 0.
On this particular day, November 30th of 2010, the only thing that was supposed to happen was to complete another day of work, and return to my apartment for a nice long nap, obviously none of those things fucking happened.
After work and getting into my car, the only thing I remember next is waking up with the sun setting in the distance, and I was pulled over at what looked to be some sort of abandoned industrial park with a splitting head ache, my eyes feeling as if I had been crying for hours, and most of my body aching like I had just taken the mile run in a gym class. The only reassurance my notes held, or at had hoped would hold, were the previous notes I had written about work and groceries... and this:
I had no idea what any of it meant or why i would write anything like that, in fact I hardly remember anything else from that night besides a constant feeling of discomfort to the point where it was almost painful.
And that is when the nightmares started.
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